Wright’s Last Laugh (Throwing knives)

Most of the time an argument is firmly settled when the head and body of an ape is penetrated by three steel throwing knives. The cutthroat bandit who ambushed a Wright military officer on patrol in Prospect Street, Lanurk definitely was of that same opinion.

Muggings sometimes happen, but most of the time when a thug yells “money, or your life Ser” the cordial exchange of money takes place without further incident. On a dark rainy night in the generally peaceful streets of Lanurk, the usual procedure would not take place as the mugger had intended. A Wright Military officer paraded down the alleys alone and looked to be a prime target for some easy money. From the shadows in the alley the mugger shot up and quietly approached the Wright ape from behind. “Value your life Ser? If you know what is good for you, better reach into your pockets and hand over all your money”

Angrily, the Wright ape turned around to face the mugger and growled back at him. As it was fairly dark it was not that easy to see what was going on, so the mugger panicked and took two quick steps back. The Wright ape seemed to have no intention of stopping, so further panic took hold of the mugger. In a desperate attempt to regain the upper hand he reached into his pockets and procured a set of blue saw-toothed throwing knives. With full force he thrust the first knife straight into the gut of the military officer. Another groan could be heard, but the ape pressed on. A second knife was launched into the chest of the ape with the same result. Now with only one knife left and the Wright ape was no more than ten steps away, the mugger let out a cry, mustered all his power and threw the knife dead center in between the eyes of the angry charging ape. This time the ape fell down on his back, and the mugger doubled over in sheer relief that this ordeal had gone in his favor in the end.

A few seconds later when the mugger went over to empty the pockets of the supposedly dead ape, the Wright ape opened his eyes, and said “Boo”. This was too much for the mugger. He froze in his step and at that point, his heart gave up and stopped beating. The mugger dropped to the ground and perished in that alley.

Had the thug been a bit more observant he would have noticed that the Wright ape was indeed a Zombie. This little detail would perhaps have swayed him not taking these last actions, but alas mistakes were made. The Wright Zombie has ever since let these blue serrated steel throwing knives remain lodged in his body and they are now considered weapons of fame for all the apes in the area.